Why those women loved and wept it were not hard to guess: but they could not have had greater reasons for love and grief than my heart has. Nain's widow saw her son restored—but I myself have been raised to newness of life. Peter's wife's mother was cured of the fever—but I of the greater plague of sin. Out of Magdalene seven devils were cast—but a whole legion out of me. Mary and Martha were favoured with visits—but He dwells with me. His mother bare His body—but He is formed in me the hope of glory. In nothing behind the holy women in debt, let me not be behind them in gratitude or sorrow. --Apr. 9 morning devotion, "Morning and Evening" by Charles Spurgeon
Could people ever understand the full extent of the change in me?
Doubtful, but one can always hope. I write about change often because recognizing that very thing in people, myself included, has become a driving force in my life. Hope. That's what drives change, what bestows vision, what gives men wings. In the final moments of each day, what do you think about? That cute guy/chick you saw on your commute? The stress of work? The sudden realization that your work/home life is an endless cycle of mediocrity, never to shine, glow with spirit and purpose?
I think about how I've changed.
How I've changed, how far I've come along because God guides me in strange and wonderful ways. I don't deserve what I've been given. And then, now what? How can I use what I've been given to help others? I also ponder that now, but of course, a full answer won't be revealed all at once. I will find my wings, someday. And then, at what cost? Any life, Christian or otherwise, is full of pain and sorrow. What defines each person is how they deal with their tribulations. They shape, define, forge personalities and cement your spirit. Hmm...my thoughts are becoming a bit more erratic as the hours go on, so I will end them here.
"Let me not be behind them in gratitude or sorrow."
